I was talking about my blog last night with a friend, and I was saying that there was just no way to sugarcoat my time with Comcast. Simply put, Comcast was the worst job I have ever had. There is no other way to say it. There is no other way to express the horrid existence that encompassed my every moment at Comcast.
I joined the ranks of Comcast when I left Flextronics on a whim. I felt that Flextronics had terribly mistreated me (which was somewhat true), and that the only way to escape was to seek other employment elsewhere. Of course, Comcast would be such a place, right? I mean, they are a multi-billion dollar company that owns their own networks, call centers, and what not. This would be my plan, to get in at a call center and eventually through my hard work and dedication apply and land a job with either CN8 (which is now the Comcast Network) or Comcast Sports Philly. I had months of experience working in TV. I had years of training for TV Production and Film. Surely, this would have to work. I was wrong yet again. And, being wrong this time led to perhaps the worst year of my working life.
I worked in a Call Center with Comcast. I was hired for the APG or Advanced Products Group Department. When I was hired I was told that there would be no selling involved (as that was a concern of mine) and that I would be troubleshooting internet issues from people. I would not be taking any calls about cable or the rather new phone that Comcast had launched. My only concern was to troubleshoot the internet, and that was the most of it.
It sounded like an utopia. I would just have to tell people to unplug their modem. wait 30 seconds, and try to get online again. I'd do this between 20 and 30 times a day, and I'd get paid for it. It was beyond an easy payday. This was getting paid to basically sit there, watch TV, and tell people to do something that they should have done before they called us.
However, Comcast had a series of metrics in place to ensure misery on your part. First, they timed your calls. It's been so long now that I forget exactly what the metric was at the time, but it was something like a 5 minute call average. Think about that. Within 5 minutes you should have gotten the customer's info, verified it, troubleshot their issue, ask them if they had any other issues, and say goodbye. The first problem with this is obviously some people that call are just slow either mentally or physically. Some people would call and their modems are nestled in the corner of a basement that only a trained acrobat could get to. Some people had no idea what a "modem" was. Some people didn't even have the power to their computer on. It was times like this that you would go a bit crazy because you knew you were in a bind, and if you were on a call longer than say, 12 minutes, you would have a supervisor or one of their lackeys come over and ask you why you were on the phone for "so long". The job was still bearable, but things soon changed.
I was trained to take calls about phone issues soon after I started (I believe within three months). These calls were much more technical, and took more time to figure out. Sometimes, it was an issue we couldn't fix and we'd send it off to the appropriate department. This took time though, and raised your average call time. The biggest issue I had initially with the phone issues was on Thanksgiving of '07, after 8pm, I was the only one on staff for the entire state of New Jersey to take phone issues. So, while my co-workers were literally throwing a football over my head and generally loafing off, I had call after call after miserable call. Honestly, most people took 4 or 5 calls the entire night. I took 35 or so. I nearly quit that night.
The second metric that added to my misery was around the fifth month there, they decided to make us, the service department, sell. Now, remember, I asked during my interview(s) (to three different people) if selling was part of the job. I was told by three different people during the interview process that there would be absolutely no way that selling would be involved, much less as a way for you to be measured on as a successful troubleshooter. Before the switch to selling, my numbers were pretty good, if not excellent. My average call time was excellent. My hold time was excellent. The calls that were reviewed were good to excellent. All the metrics they measured me by were golden. They were so good, that within five to six months of employment I was promoted to a level 2 position. Level 3 would never come to pass simply based off my upgrades (selling).
In a word, I felt betrayed that this company was looking so desperately for revenue that they figured they could make us sell. I felt betrayed because I was told in the interview and the months in between that selling was never going to be an issue. I felt betrayed...because soon it became a reason to put people on PIPs (Personal Improvement Plans) that would stop you from transferring to other places. I couldn't see what selling a person faster internet had to do with transferring into the Production department. I couldn't see what selling a second phoneline to people had to do with getting into dispatch. But, if you were on a PIP, it disqualified you from transferring out of the call center and going anywhere else.
When I found out about the impending doom of selling crap to people that they couldn't afford or even need, I tried like a madman to transfer anywhere but the call center. I tried Dispatch, several TV positions, Research, etc. Those applications for internal transfer just sat there for months while my numbers went south based solely on my upgrade numbers which were now more important than any other metric we had. In the course of perhaps three months, I went from someone who was promoted rather quickly to someone of the verge of being placed on a PIP. I saw my intentions of using the call center as a springboard to a TV position go up in smoke right before my eyes all due to something I never had the intention to do.
Just after about 9 months of being there, I was formally placed on my first PIP. This led to meetings with my apathetic and MIA supervisor, the Night Manager, and eventually the Director of APG. I know it was after my second meeting with both my supervisor and Night Manager that I decided I would just phone it in from there on in. I was told during that meeting that it was their job to make sure I was happy whether that was with Comcast or not. From that point forward, the writing was on the wall, and I decided I would just show up and take calls. I sure as hell wasn't going to sell. But, I would take calls, troubleshoot, and wait for the pink slip that would surely be coming my way.
But, the pink slip would never come. I would stroll in a half hour late and not a word would be said. I would sometimes get on the train to go to work, get off at the station, and just get back on and go home. I would call Comcast and use their very liberal Flex-Time, and nothing would ever be said about it. I swear, I didn't show up for about a month at one point, and I still had a job. I just came back to work and NO ONE said a thing. I still get health insurance, pension, and the like from Comcast. For months afterward, I was still signed up for trainings through the company. It was so odd. I couldn't shake this place.
Other reasons why Comcast was so horrid was the management team never, and I mean, never wanted to help out. With the exception of my first supervisor (who wisely left APG soon after selling became a huge metric), I had a series of increasingly horrid supervisors. The first was a Kermit look alike that was never at his desk after 6pm when most of the calls started coming through. I'd have to search through the maze of desks, lockers, and cubicles to find someone who could help out. There was a rather large, fat, and lazy supervisor who stayed at her desk, but she would make such an issue out of you coming to her, that you hated seeking her out. "Where's YOUR supervisor?" she would ask already knowing the answer that he was in the gym or not even on site. We had a Tier Two team that was just right next to us, but we couldn't ask them for help for reasons I don't even understand. Here's the people right here who could settle an issue, but let me fill out this form instead and hope they fix it within 48 hours.
Finally, the people who called in were just horrible people. There were a few good natured souls who were very happy that you were there to help them get back online so they could watch porn (I had one guy at midnight tell me that). But, I'd say a good 90% of the people were bitter souls who didn't know how to deal with people. They would curse at you. They would belittle you. They would threaten you with bodily harm. We had one guy who was so bad...he was actually a gravedigger (I can't make this up) and he would call in whenever his meds wore off and make women cry (seriously). He would say the most outlandish and messed up things. I never got to take one of his calls, but whenever he called in there would be an email alert that he was on the prowl.
But, even if you didn't have these extremes, most people were generally complete a-holes. Like I said, they didn't know how to deal with people and would just yell and scream demanding everything under the sun. One call after another was the norm. I was called everything under the sun and back again...all because they couldn't get online (usually due to their own incompetence). It was insane how people would treat you. At my peak I averaged 40 calls a night and I'd say 30 to 35 cursed me out, called me an idiot, or wished death upon me. It's not because of anything I had said. This was usually their greeting to me..."You SOB, I f-ing hate Comcast, and you f-ers f-ing f-ed up my internet, and now I can't get HD channels on my f-ing TV because you're all f-ing f-s. You listenin' to me, you f-ing idiot?" After a while, this bears down upon you.
So, I never did get to transfer to TV Production. I never did become a Level 3 CAE. No, my career was stalled at Level 2 and since I wouldn't sell, I would forever be a Level 2. I felt there was no career advancement because I tried to get out of the call center while my numbers were still on the up and up. Hell, I even tried to transfer to the warehouse...seriously. I tried all this because I did feel that Comcast was recession proof and they provide stability. But, I just couldn't bear being called a f-ing idiot one more time, and I just couldn't stand the thought of being stuck in a call center for the rest of my days. Add to it I was going through a rough patch mentally at the time, and well, I made my decision to use all my Flex-Time and never come back. And, that's what I did. I was hired at Col Penn just as I took my last Flex day. And, even though Col Penn didn't work out, it was a reprieve from the horrible place that Comcast was. I met some great people at Comcast that I keep up with on facebook and all. We're not close friends, but we keep up with one another. I don't harbor any ill will toward the company because I do think they offer some good services, and overall I'm happy with the Triple Play I currently have. I just wish that selling never became a part of success there, and I could have transfered out to TV which was my intention, and which I was told would be an option for me due to my background. I was lied to by nearly everyone in the company and held back. I think they just wanted to keep everyone in their place.
But, overall, it wasn't so bad. Some of the callers were fun. Like the old guy who called after the McCain/Obama debate and told me Obama was born in Kenya and we shouldn't put him on TV. Or, there was the "meow" game I would play with a few customers here or there. My record was 21 "meows" in the course of a conversation (the "meow" game was inspired by Super Troopers). I was on a podcast for a while that was fun, but I felt wasn't going anywhere. Maybe I'll start calling in again. It was fun to do. The co workers were the only reason to like the job. Everything else was rubbish.
Up next in the series, "Life on Hold: The TL's Guide to Flextronics".
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