Meeting the Radiation Oncologist

Marion was originally scheduled for the Radiation Consultation on February 2nd. On Wednesday, the office called up and said they had an appointment available for Thursday. We jumped on the opportunity to move this appointment up by about a week and get closer to eventual treatment.

The oncologist did a full exam which always makes me uncomfortable because it's usually after such a full exam that Marion starts bleeding again. I don't know why he has to fool around with the tumor and use the tools and what not when he has literally pages upon pages of reports, slides, and film. As part of the simulation process to mark the tumor, he'll be using either a MRI or CT scan. So, it's beyond me why he felt the need to dive in and take a look around when the bleeding can start anytime and she's already anemic from the loss of blood she's suffered from already.

Besides the exam, the Doctor (whose name escapes me) was generally a nice guy and seemed overwhelmingly concerned with Marion's care. He didn't talk down to either of us, and made sure we understood the process before us. He explained some of the side effects after the exam...most of which I had no idea of. Due to their graphic and disturbing nature, I won't go into them here, but suffice it to say even with the possible side effects, the good outweighs the bad.

The next step is the simulation which as I said is the process of marking the tumor out precisely so nearby healthy tissue is not damaged by the radiation process. Radiation is somewhat dangerous, but it's unfortunately a necessary evil.

Once we got home, Marion's spirits dropped a bit. I think it's all catching up with her. I think she's been in a haze just going to a from all the appointments and that it's now just sinking in. It kills me because I can look at it clinically, and I try to let her know that this is a really aggressive plan and that her Doctors are really attempting to cure her. But, it's those lingering doubts that screw around with you. There's so much that's unknown. We're not sure how her body will react to the treatments and things like that. It's just a trial and error type of thing and it's that uncertainty that plays to your fears. I really think she'll do okay...

So, we stand one step closer to the treatments. We stand on the verge of hope.